Thriturday

Chicken truck today. I went early when there was no line, but it turns out that means you have to talk to the clerk for a while before you can order. Like @DOB I would pay extra for the no talking version of any service. But I did learn that rubberized spray-on bedliner is available in metallic colors after only a couple of rounds of defending my apparently subversive nails.

Actually worked on the perf bug today. It looks like the test that was accepted-as-failed before my work was already causing a swap condition, so my stuff never had a chance. Hopefully I can find a workaround for that issue so I can test mine in isolation and kick this thing. Didn’t get any SR work done though, and between the lawyer and robots and the lawyer it’s unlikely they’ll even be Friday me’s problem — I guess Saturday me is doing market labor instead of TV updates.

Went to Not Another D&D Podcast’s (@Emily Axford, et. al) first live show with Shanda. We haven’t seen any of the actual podcast so we had no idea what their campaign was doing, but we’re big fans of the people so we went anyway. It was a nice time at Triple Door; we had a whole booth and were able to put our feet up and snuggle in. And the game was pretty good too – one of the characters is addicted to ‘Arcane, which was hilarious. And they fought someone who was running an evil crossfit gym*.

Talked with Shanda about what she wants out of her new plans for dating. She’s not super sure yet and it makes her sort of dangerously passive even as she starts acting. She doesn’t like to frame it in these terms, but I’m pretty sure she’s a bit stuck on societally assigned roles for romantic relationships, which are obviously not useful for her situation. None of us ever really know what we’re doing when we start something new, and for her that means no sharing. I wish it was eaiser for her to let me in, so she didn’t have to figure all this out by herself.

The show tonight was on of the longest times that Shanda and I have both been away from Rev and her was super excited to see us when we got home. I think he might like me better when I’m slightly neglectful. I’m still not quite comfortable with the amount of attention he pays to me, but it’s reassuring to see he misses me even if it makes me worry about not providing enough of the right kind of care.

Went to see the lawyer today about H debt. I think we’re gonna hire him**; he seems to think that will work out, and I’d sure like to make this stop being a thing. Given the speed of the civil court system that won’t actually happen until 9 months from now, but once I have an attorney it will be officially illegal to harass me about it.

Shanda is going over to B’s tonight but should be home later. She might be dying her hair with phosphorescent blue, which I’m excited about. I’m still trying to talk her into the mohawk she has always wanted (even if she is still afraid to admit it) but UV blue sounds like lots of fun.

I had to talk to S today about his participation in the oppression of young people. It wasn’t anything egregious, but it was plenty dismissive of problems real people were having, and he was out of touch enough to not even respond appropriately when I reiterated the problem from an old person perspective. So we got to have that fun conversation where you explain to someone how they’re causing pain while they think they’re helping, while he drove me home.

I took the dog for a walk and tried real hard to reverse engineer a logical reason why I ought to hate it, even though I was currently doing it and enjoying it well enough. I was chastising myself for not having the right motivation for walking – for doing it only for Rev. I got a dog in part because I intended to have it help me take care of myself as a mammal. But my feelings are pretty sure that doesn’t count and I should still feel bad about my insufficient self-care. Or maybe that I should feel bad for wanting to have self-care.

Had the best and worst social dog experiences while I was out, just moments apart. Made it through almost the whole walk without meeting another human, which is always my goal. In the last block coming home we passed someone who didn’t have a dog and didn’t talk to me but did talk to Rev both they and Rev were excited by the interaction. That’s the ideal sort of service I imagine providing with a the help of a dog. Then 20 seconds later someone with a dog passed and said “I remember you” to me before asking me a small talk question and expecting me to pause and respond and manage the interaction of our dogs. This is of course the worst possible outcome of leaving the house. Life could at least have put them I the right order, so I could end with the good one.

I’ve been busy and/or sick every day this week, both at home and at work, with the dog and with Shanda, etc. I haven’t been able to Screed properly in days. By happenstance @BPS is having similar issues this week, in terms of producing their usual work, and the complications of changing the process. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qQ8QJGPD2Qg I’m not having any trouble writing but I am having trouble adapting my process to deal with busy days, or to accommodate multiple days without becoming nonsense.

But I did have time this week to talk with M about how I imagine interacting with the world for my own benefit, which told me important things about the job I want. And I talked with DerbyK about Melissas, which helped me avoid feeling terrible about mine. And I found a lawyer. And I made progress on the perf bug. And I helped Shanda figure out the next bits if what she wants on several fronts. And I arranged for the delivery of both cookies and kangaroo. So it’s not all been bad.

And I got to show off my middle fingernail when someone asked what color “teal” was, which was a great “I’ve got something for this” moment. It’s like a vulgar pun but with props.

ZiB

*Obviously all crossfit gyms are inherently evil, but this one literally involved eating elderly halflings as part of a plan to “confuse your muscles”.

**For the first time in my life. Literally decades after I should have for all sort of things including organizing my business and writing a will and whatnot. I suppose I have similar if less severe aversion to having professional help, like I do for physicians.

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Sent from a phone.